The Incredible Burt Wonderstone (2013) - Movie Review

Is it too late for Steve Carell to go back to The Office for the series finale?

It's not that The Incredible Burt Wonderstone is a career killer, but it's the kind of film where even on paper it wasn't very strong idea with a really small margin for error.  If you don't knock it out of the park, then you're going to have really mediocre film on your hands.

We meet Burt as a small, bullied kid.  You immediately feel for him when he gets beaten up in front of his own house on his birthday.  His mother, whom we never meet (which seemed like a missed opportunity for a good, gag-casting), gives him a magician's starter kit featuring an old school magician, Rance Holloway (Alan Arkin). This part of the film I thought was amusing as there were a few subtle 80's references that made me laugh.  Burt dives headfirst into learning magic, but it hasn't made him any more popular at school.  He befriends another outcast kid, Anton, and they decide to become a magic team.  As far as the story goes, this as actually the strongest part, as kids were pretty sympathetic and you understand why they became friends.

We fast forward several years, and Burt (Carell) and Anton (Steve Buscemi) have become a successful Vegas magic show act.  Things are going well for a while, and they are making millions.  You see their cheesy, tired antics and it's kind of funny.  Performing magic is evolving though, and people aren't turning out for their shows anymore.  This is mainly due to the popularity of street magician Steve Gray "The Brain Rapist" (Jim Carrey).

I guess the good news is there are some silly laughs from time to time.  Unfortunately, the laughs are more of the polite chuckle variety, with no real gut-busting moments.  It's a shame, too, as there are many times you're watching Burt Wonderstone and wonder why it's so tame or how much funnier it would have been if they had taken a few of the bits in a different direction.  Nothing every really hits, so we're left with something that's mildly amusing, but a huge missed opportunity considering the cast.  It's also very forgettable.  One of the characteristics of any good comedy is quotability, and I can't recall a single line or gag that has that kind of impact.  I realize that it sometimes takes multiple viewings for something to really stick, but I don't think this is the kind of comedy that you're going to want to watch over and over.

I guess I'm a little disappointed considering the writing team of Jonathan Goldstein and John Francis Daley are two-thirds of the team that wrote Horrible Bosses (maybe they really needed that last 1/3rd), and director Don Scardino has directed many episodes of 30 Rock.  You'd think the comedy would be the strongest point of the film.  I think one of the issues is that they went with a PG-13 rating, when a movie like this really needs to be R.  It's not that a PG or PG-13 movie can't be funny, but it can really limit the humor.

Even the story itself is pretty cliched for the kind of comedy it was.  You have the stubborn, out-of-touch star, unable to adapt and loses everything.  Then, the young upstart takes his place.  Finally, the star goes back to his roots, regains humility and comes back stronger with an updated approach.  You could have swapped out magic for any sport and it would have been the same movie.

I'm a big Steve Carell fan, but I thought his performance was all over the place.  I think you can attribute a lot of that to how his character was written and directed, but it don't think he was the best fit.  It was almost like he seemed uncomfortable at times, or maybe that's just how the performance made me feel.  The supporting cast I enjoyed more, Olivia Wilde and Jim Carrey in particular.  I've been on hard on Wilde in the past, but I think she worked really well playing it straight off Carell and I'd like to see her take on more roles like this.  I know Jim Carrey isn't everyone's cup of tea these days, but I though he was another smart casting and his style really suited his character (I also think he looks really good in the upcoming Kick-Ass sequel). Alan Arkin was good as well, and he's one person I wish had been in it a little more.  There are a few small cameos and smaller roles from comedic actors that you may get a kick out of, but it's not enough to get this over the hump.  I realized I haven't said anything about Steve Buscemi, but it's because he's actually not in it all that much.  It really focuses more on Burt Wonderstone, and the problem is that he's really just not that great of a character.

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone is a dull comedy that just never really hits a good stride and plays it way too safe.  Even the great cast couldn't elevate this, and we're left with a very mediocre and forgettable movie.  It's a rental.  Perhaps we get an unrated version on DVD, so I'd say to hold out for that.

2 (out of 5) Death Stars

Oz the Great and Powerful (2013) - Movie Review

Indeed he is powerful, as the Emperor has foreseen...

We haven't had a great start to 2013, but the one exception so far has been with movies related to fantasy elements.  Much like how last week Jack and the Giant Slayer was an example of the reimaging of a classic story that worked (even though I wasn't in love with it), Oz the Great and Powerful is an example of a 'prequel' that expands on a classic story without stepping on the toes of the original.

Oscar (James Franco), who has maybe the longest full name in movie history, so he just goes by "Oz", is a magician in a travelling circus.  He's also a selfish con-man and womanizer that treats his friends poorly.  While Oz has his charms, he isn't exactly the most likable guy in the world.  Despite this, you do get some entertainment value from watching Oz try to bullshit his way through a situation or into a woman's undergarments.  The latter gets him into to trouble and he's forced to flee the circus in a hot air balloon, but the bad luck piles on as he's immediately caught in a tornado and whisked away to the land of Oz.

Upon arriving, he's greeted by the witch Theodora (Mila Kunis), who tells Oz the prophecy of a wizard that will save them from a wicked witch.  Theodora believes Oz is that wizard, but her sister Evanora (Rachel Weisz) isn't convinced.  Even Oz himself doesn't believe he has what it takes, but goes along with it due to the huge fortune he stands to gain, as well as the chance to hook up with either Theordora or Evanora.  I can't say I blame him on that second part at all.  Oz heads out on a quest to stop the Wicked Witch, joined by Finley, a flying monkey that pledges himself to Oz (and voiced by Zach Braff), and a small china doll (voiced by Joey King).

It's best to stop there are there a few twists and plot developments that caught me by surprise, but fans more intimate with The Wizard of Oz may figure these things out before I did.

What made Oz the Great and Powerful fun to watch was that there were a lot of nice little touches and callbacks to the original The Wizard of Oz without being totally obvious or winking at the audience when doing it.  It does a really good job of being respectful to the original Oz while managing to feel like an original story on it's own.  For younger audiences I think this will serve to get them more interested in the other stories of Oz and watch those as well.

Oz... is an absolutely gorgeous film.  The visuals play out like the trailer, starting in black and white with a 4:3 aspect ratio. This part of the film had a much older, classic look to it.  When we arrive in Oz the color palate opens up and the screen expands to its full size.  The world they created was very vibrant and colorful, with tons of details in every scene and there was always something interesting to look at on screen.  I often found myself distracted by something in the background, and had that take my attention to the point where I almost lost track of what was going on.  The effects were top notch throughout the film, and the look and animation of China Girl was particularly impressive to me.   However, there were a few times it looked a little too CG-ish.  This may have been due to the 3D or the fact that I saw it on IMAX and didn't sit close enough to the middle, so sometimes things were blurry or looked off.  I did think this had really good use of 3D, and it's a time where I don't think seeing it in 3D would be a total waste.  There's a great waterfall sequence where you really feel how the 3D immersed you into the action, and you can also see how this will likely end up a ride at Disneyland.  Unless you can get there early for IMAX and get a seat in the middle, I'd recommend just standard 3D though.

Another thing that looked a little odd to me was the makeup for the Wicked Witch.  It was too clean or new looking, which I guess makes sense since this is her origin and she's younger, but I thought maybe a little more dirt or grime would have helped.

The cast all seemed to be having a blast.  I wasn't sure if James Franco was the right choice for the lead role, but my doubts quickly dissolved.  He really owned the role and was able to use his comedic chops to ham it up when needed.  I also think Rachel Weisz was really great as Evanora.  She's always been one of those actresses that's hard to take your eyes off of, but here I think she was having a lot of fun and chewing up a little bit of scenery.  Mila Kunis and Michelle Williams were also very good, but I can't say too much about them without revealing too much about their characters.

I was more impressed with the voice acting, Zach Braff in particular.  While I've always liked Braff (I'm a HUGE Scrubs fan), I've never thought anything of his voice until now.  He really does have a perfect voice for animated characters, and I thought his work for Finely was spot on and very funny.  I was also impressed by Joey King's voice work as China Girl.  There's a lot of emotion in her voice, and I would have guessed that the work was done by an older, more experienced actress.

One thing that caught be by surprise was that I genuinely didn't know this was directed by Sam Raimi until the opening credits.  That automatically made perk up a bit and take notice of certain things.  You could definitely feel Raimi's influence with some of the subtle humor and occasional scares, but otherwise it didn't feel like a Sam Raimi film.  In a lot of ways this may remind you of Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland, especially since Danny Elfman did the soundtrack, but Raimi out-Burtoned Tim Burton.  And yes, as with all Raimi films, there is a Bruce Campbell appearance.

The script by Mitchell Kapner and David Lindsay-Abaire has a little something for everyone.  There's humor that only adults will pick up on, and things that are a little more for the kids.  I heard lots of chuckles throughout the film, so it definitely has a broad appeal.  While it is PG, there are a few good jump scares that caught me by surprise, so you might need to be careful with the really young kids, but I don't think it's anything that's going to give them nightmares.

Oz the Great and Powerful is a fun film that the whole family can enjoy together.  The visuals are outstanding, and there's plenty of humor and good performances across the board.  Enough respect is given to the source material, while creating a world that still feels fresh.  Older fans of Oz should enjoy this as well as introduce a new generation to it.  I highly recommend checking it out.

3.5 (out of 5) Death Stars

Jack the Giant Slayer (2013) - Movie Review

What if I told you that Obi-Wan Kenobi, Al Swearengen, Beast from X-Men: First Class and the Dad from Easy A were all in a movie together?  Slam dunk, eh?

Actually, that's not totally respectful to Stanley Tucci, but I couldn't think of his character's name from The Hunger Games.  Could anyone though, except for you nerdy book-readers?  I'm kidding of course, as I'm actually reading The Hunger Games right now.  What the hell was I talking about again?  Oh yeah, Jack the Giant Slayer.

Jack the Giant Slayer is the latest in the re-imaging of classic fairly tales, combining elements from both "Jack and the Beanstalk" and "Jack the Giant Killer".  This is one of the times where I felt the expansion on the existing tale worked well.  You get a little more backstory about their world and then they added more typical fantasy elements. It's done in a way that felt natural to the story.  It still manages to not be all that deep, so I didn't feel afterwards that this was a world I wanted to visit again.

The basic premise hasn't changed.  Jack (Nicholas Hoult) is an orphaned farmboy living with his uncle.  He's sent into town to sell off a horse and cart.  The cart gets stolen right away, and then a monk dupes him into trading the horse for a small pouch of useless, 'magic' beans.  Yes, Jack is kind of a screw up.  Jack does (unsuccessfully) try to defend the honor of Isabelle (Eleanor Tomlinson), so at least he's a nice guy.  It turns out Isabelle is a princess who is expected to marry Roderick (Stanley Tucci), but she's not having it and wants to have adventures of her own.

This leads to her getting lost and finding Jack's house.  While taking shelter from the rain, one of the beans gets wet and a giant beanstalk grows upwards rejoining the human and giant realms.  Isabelle is carried away to the giant realm, so the King (Ian McShane) orders a small group of soldiers, let by Elmont (Ewan McGregor) to rescue her.  However, the giants haven't forgotten the humans (the humans have forgotten all about them) and how delicious they taste, so they are anxious to get back down to the human realm for some snacking.  It's up to Jack, the nice screwup, and Obi-Wan to stop them.

The main issue I had with Jack the Giant Slayer was that I felt it was all kind of lifeless.  There's no zip at all to the dialog, and not much chemistry between any of the characters.  I think it's the same problem the Star Wars prequels had in that there's so much CG that the actors don't react naturally to what's going on around them since nothing is actually there.  I will say that the CG is good, actually great in a few places, but I still got that sterile feeling I get from movies that use too much of it.  It's like The Hobbit, where sometimes you feel like you're watching a video game cutscene.

Another issue I had was that you have this great cast, and then don't really get to do much.  I was hoping that Ewan McGregor would get to show his swashbuckling, Jedi swordplay chops (even though I still hate Obi-Wan for what he did to me), but he doesn't get much of a chance to fight.  He actually loses his sword pretty early on in the movie, and then in the one hand-to-hand fight he has it's with Stanley Tucci, who's holding his own against him, despite not being a trained soldier.  You'd think a trained soldier would be able to beat the crap out of an aristocrat in like two seconds.  Stanley Tucci plays 'obviously evil guy' and has a creepy henchman (Ewan Bremner). They were about as generic as villains can get.  I was disappointed that there wasn't much to Ian McShane's character either.  There's just not much for him to do other than deliver his lines.  He seemed kind of bored with it.

I did like Nicholas Hoult and Eleanor Tomlinson (who reminds of me of a young Rachel Weisz), even though I didn't think there was a ton of chemistry between the two.  They are attractive and easy enough to like, but again, there's just not that much beneath the surface of their characters.

I'm going to harp on the dialog again.  It's actually not bad, but it's disappointing that there wasn't anything really clever about it.  Most of the humor came from fart jokes, and I only heard kids laughing at those moments.  There's this scene at the end (it's in the trailer, but maybe I'm remembering it wrong from the film), where the main giant catches Jack and he goes, "Who are you?"  Jack replies defiantly, "It's Jack!"  As if the giant knows who Jack is, or that should mean something to him.  Dialog really fails when it's just for the audience, and not for the characters in the film.  It would have been great if the giant replied, "And that means 'what' to me?"  The screenplay by Darren Lemke, Dan Studney and Christopher McQuarrie (never a good sign when there's three writers), really needed some punch up.  I'm surprised especially with McQuarrie's involvement, as he has written some great stories in the past.

When I heard Bryan Singer was involved, I took that as a mark of quality, as I figured he was just producing.  I was very surprised to see he actually directed it, as I didn't think he would have made something that's so clearly a kids film.  There is a lot of action and with the effects being as good as they are, that aspect of the film is entertaining and it's biggest strength. Jack the Giant Slayer isn't boring and well paced for a two hour film.

Even though this is PG-13, I didn't think there were any particularly scary images, and I didn't see any of the kids in the audience covering their eyes.  It'll depend on the kid, of course, but it might be a little too much for kids under 5.  The whole movie I thought about how much my nephews (8 and 5) would like it.  Contrast this with both X-Men and X-Men 2, which were both PG-13, and while also not bloody, both films felt so much more adult.  There are a lot of deaths in the film, but the film was largely bloodless or the camera cuts away at the point of impact.  Most of the deaths are of the video game variety, and involve disposable 'red shirt' characters.  The characters are so disposable that they didn't even bother with giving them decent names, if they were given names at all.  One of the guards name was "Bald".  Yes, he was bald.  I kept waiting for "Four Eyes" and "Porkins" to show up.  Anyway, I really think they could have gotten away with giving this one a PG rating.

Jack the Giant Slayer is sometimes fun and has really good effects, but ultimately a little too flat to be considered great.  They assembled a great cast, but then didn't give them much to do or anything interesting to say. If there had been a little more wit about it, then I think this would have had a much broader appeal, but it's ultimately a kids film. If you have a kid in that 5-12 range, then I think you can take them to a matinee and won't be too bored yourself. For anyone else, this is a rental.

3 (out of 5) Death Stars

21 & Over (2013) - Movie Review

From the writers of The Hangover, it's yet another version of The Hangover...

High School buddies Miller and Casey visit their friend Jeff Chang on his 21st birthday. They want to take him out for a crazy night, but Jeff Chang's scary dad (Francois Chau) reminds him that he has an important job interview in the morning.  You know that's not going to stop Miller, who's role is the irresponsible one that's born to party. They talk Jeff Chang into going out.  He drinks a lot, they get lost, crazy stuff happens, they're worried Jeff Chang won't be able to make his job interview.  Get the picture?

When watching 21 & Over you'll constantly get the feeling that you've seen this all before.  This shouldn't be a surprise since the writing and directing team of Jon Lucas and Scott Moore are the same guys that wrote The Hangover.  21 & Over is just a variation on the same theme, and these guys are starting to feel like one trick ponies. I suppose there are lots of writers and directors that recycle themes from movie to movie, but they usually aren't as obvious about it.   As much as I wanted to hate the film for how recycled and silly it is, I kept finding things to laugh at throughout the movie.

21 & Over is rated-R, which is actually a strength in that the humor isn't tame or holds back.  I didn't feel like it was crude for the sake of being shocking or for cheap laughs.  Also, because of the stronger rating, some of the better gags in the film aren't spoiled by the trailer, which is yet another credit to the film.

However, the story doesn't hold up to any kind of scrutiny.  Yeah, I know a movie like this isn't intended to be smart, but just indulge me for a bit.  Like, when Jeff Chang is clearly hammered and being belligerent to bouncers, they are still letting him into bars, when you know they'd never let him in at that point. This is the point where even his friends should have cut him off and called it a night.  Plus, the whole idea of them getting lost in a small college town is pretty hard to believe in the first place.  None of these guys have the address programmed into their phone or something?  Maybe thinking ahead isn't their strong suit.  Also, Miller and Casey are generally sober throughout the film despite drinking heavily themselves.

Then, you think about the timing of how things are playing out, it doesn't work out at all either.  At one point they mention they are only six blocks away from their destination, but then proceed to drive for what feels like an hour.  Couldn't they have walked there faster?  It's after 11 PM when they first realize they are lost, and are talking to people that are wide awake, not drunk at all, but only just on their way to a rally or party.  When they arrive at the rally and then another party, you figure it's gotta be around 2 or 3 AM.  They schedule college rallies after midnight?  Keep in mind, I went to a 'commuter college', so I didn't have the campus college experience that many of you may have.  Maybe this is something that happens all the time.

The trio themselves are pretty stereotypical group of friends.  Miller (Miles Teller is doing his best Vince Vaughn impression) is the boorish one that hasn't grown up, Casey (Skylar Astin as Paul Rudd-lite) is the serious one that's forgotten how to have fun, and Jeff Chang (Justin Chon, in what is basically the Ed Helms role) is the one with the overbearing dad and stressing out with too much studying.  You know the night is going to teach them all a valuable lesson.  Everyone has to learn something in these movies, right?  Then, there's the cute girl that Miles is after, Nicole (Sarah Wright), who conveniently neglects to mention until much later that she has a boyfriend, Randy (Jonathan Keltz), who they've already had several run-ins with.  You kind go between finding these guys a little sympathetic or relatable, to wanting to smack them at times for being stupid.  Overall, I liked their performances, so that kept me watching their adventures to see what happens next.  If everyone would have been totally unlikable there's no way you'd be able to get through the movie.

21 & Over isn't anything new.  It's dumb and crude, but it does have a few good laughs here and there.  If you've enjoyed movies like The Hangover and The Hangover Part II, then this is just more of the same, except with younger actors.  It's not a bad movie to see with some friends, have a few drinks beforehand, and enjoy it for what it is.  It's a matinee if you see it that way, otherwise, save it for rental.

2.5 (out of 5) Death Stars

Quartet (2012) - Movie Review

It's kind of like Grumpy Old Men meets Opera.  Well, maybe not quite as grumpy...

That's how I described Quartet right after seeing it.  I'm probably overstating it a bit, as it's not the same kind of movie, nor is it as funny as Grumpy Old Men, but it was a pleasant surprise to watch.  I really wasn't interested in seeing yet another movie featuring Maggie Smith in a retirement community.  I just watched Best Exotic Marigold Hotel recently, and I was in the minority in not being a big fan of that film, despite the great cast.

Even as Quartet began, I had to wrap my head around the premise of people living in a retirement home for musicians.  Such a thing exists?  I had to do some searching and it appears that there are niche retirement communities popping up.  Many believe it's the future of retirement.  It's actually not a bad idea, and then I thought about other niche communities that might be desirable, like ones for fitness enthusiasts, movie aficionados, gamers, or sex addicts.  Okay, maybe not that last one.  I just gave myself the willies thinking about it.

Actually, that's related to one of the aspects of the film that I enjoyed the most.  The movie's focus is on quartet of opera singers, but the biggest personality of them belongs to Wilf (Billy Connolly), who's basically a walking hard-on, hitting on all the women in the community, always looking to sneak in a drink, or trying to get high.  I'm not exactly looking forward to getting old, but when I do, I want to be just like Wilf.  Some might find his antics in the film a little too cute, but without him, I don't think Quartet would have been nearly as enjoyable.  Besides, if more old people acted like Wilf, I think we'd all have a little more fun.

Tension builds in their community, when the last, and most famous member, of their quartet moves in.  Jean (Maggie Smith) isn't wild about living there, but her ex-husband Reg (Tom Courtenay) is even less thrilled when he finds out.

Meanwhile, we learn that the retirement community isn't doing all that great financially, but if the quartet can be convinced to put aside their differences and perform their famous song from Rigoletto at an annual concert,  this will help raise enough money to keep the place afloat.

The plot itself is pretty light, and there's not a lot of time spent on the details, which was fine with me.  The real focus of the film are on characters and their history.  Quartet was based on a play by Ronald Harwood, who also wrote the screenplay. What's getting more attention is the fact that this is Dustin Hoffman's directorial debut.  I don't know what took him so long to direct, but I think Hoffman did a good job with all the actors and getting us to care about them, while keeping the story breezy enough that it never feels too heavy handed. The drama between the quartet and story plays out pretty predictably, so I didn't get much emotionally from it, but much of this was played for light laughs.

This is helped by the rest of the cast.  Dumbledore (Michael Gambon) is the director of the concert, who takes things way too seriously, and Wilf loves to give him hell at every opportunity.  Pauline Collins plays the funny and sweet fourth member of the quartet who's struggles the most with her memory, but you somehow get the feeling she might not have been the brightest of the four in the first place.  Sheridan Smith also had nice chemistry with Wilf as Dr. Cogan.  Wilf hits on Dr. Cogan constantly, and I took great delight in watching his various attempts to seduce her.

Quartet is a sweet and charming film that might not be for everyone, but I found it funny and enjoyable to watch.  Much like how some kids films have elements hat will will appeal to adults, this is the film you could take your grandparents to and still enjoy yourself.  It's nothing you need to rush out and see, but a good rental or a nice matinee.

3.5 (out of 5) Death Stars

Dark Skies (2013) - Movie Review

I think this is the alien version of an atomic wedgie...

I really don't have much to say about Dark Skies, so I'll try to keep this short.  I wasn't even sure what kind of 'horror' film this was going to be based on the commercials.  Was this going to be supernatural themed or alien themed?  The opening credits ends that suspense, but when watching Dark Skies, I became convinced that even writer/director Scott Stewart wasn't sure what kind of film he wanted to make.  When you see how the end plays out, I believe that a lot of what was in the film felt like reshoots done after initial test screenings didn't go well. It doesn't help that it borrows heavily from movies like Poltergeist and Close Encounters either.  I get that a horror film these days is going to have a lot of familiar elements, but the problem with Dark Skies is that it doesn't fully commit to either angle, so we're left with a muddled and uninteresting flick.

I thought the film might actually have a chance at first was because of the cast.  I've always liked Keri Russell, but I would think she's at a point in her career where she doesn't need to be in such a generic horror film.  She seemed like she was really trying, too.  Her older son (Dakota Goyo), has kind of a funny arc about trying to get his first kiss and grab a boob, which I felt was one of the better parts of the film.  It made me think I was watching real people for a change.  The entire family felt pretty realistic in the first half of the film.  I really perked up when I saw J.K. Simmons name in the opening credits, because it's rare when he's in something I don't like. Unfortunately, when he finally does show up as 'the alien expert', it's so late in the film that I had actually forgot he was supposed to be in it.  His scenes are pretty disconnected from the rest of the film, as they only occur in his apartment (in an undisclosed location), which further added to the feeling that his entire presence in the film was added as afterthought.

Another reason why I think this wasn't always supposed to be an alien flick is due to the fact that when they are first revealed, the alien has a different look than the ones you see at the end of the film.  There's a good hour in-between their appearances. Also, what's up with aliens always being naked?  When going to another planet, don't you think some kind of uniform or environmental protection might be important?  They've created the advanced technology to travel millions of light years and abduct people and experiment on them without detection, but they've evolved past the point of needing clothes? They don't need pockets?

So, Dark Skies decides to go with aliens, but what do they want?  They just want to bully and screw with you.  First, it's a mess being made in the kitchen (one time was a pretty obvious ripoff of Poltergeist).  Then, all of the pictures in their house are stolen, but they leave the frames behind.  At one point we see a bazillion birds kamikaze into their house, and nobody knows why.  Things escalate to the entire family hearing weird ringing in their ears, bruises and marks show up on their bodies, and they even have black outs, losing hours at a time.  Again, there's not a lot about what's happening that is specific to aliens, versus something supernatural.  Markings do appear that seem to be of alien origin, but when other parents notice them on the kids, people think they are being abused.  That's actually an area of the film that could have been really interesting if they had used that more.  Do something like have Child Protective Services take the kids away, and then the parents struggle to convince others they aren't responsible and prevent their abduction by aliens at the same time.

One thing that's always bugged me about these kinds of films is that regardless of whether it's aliens, demons, or whatever, why are they selecting someone that isn't all that important in the grand scheme of things?  If you're gonna possess or abduct someone, why not chose a world leader or someone like that?  Why is it always a pre-teen or suburban family that's the target?  It's not like these people have any ability to stop what's happening, and would anyone even notice they're missing for a while?  I guess there's something to be said for going after an easy target.  Well, the explanation for this provided by Dark Skies is that there is no reason.  No reason at all.  When the parents finally talk to J.K. Simmons, he tells them that it's just what the aliens do, and they've been doing it this way for a long time.  When they ask why they're being experimented on, they are basically told, "Do doctors explain to lab rats why they do the things they do?  Would you even understand if they did?" So, I came away from Dark Skies thinking the aliens were like a cat playing with a mouse before eating it, or sadistic kids torturing small animals.

The thing is that it still would have been a passable movie if it wasn't so boring.  It honestly felt well over two hours long, and I was shocked to find it was only 95 minutes.  Part of why it's so boring is that Dark Skies is not scary at all.  There are a few cheap jump scares, and even those are telegraphed.  Some of the stuff that happens would have been creepy if the movie wasn't so slowly paced.

Dark Skies is a snoozefest that even fans of horror will have a tough time getting though.  It had potential, but it's lost with its lack of consistent direction and borrowing too heavily from better films.  There's not much I can recommend about it, and advise you to give this one a pass.

1 (out of 5) Death Stars

Snitch (2013) - Movie Review

Well, at least it's not another The Tooth Fairy...

Don't worry, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's latest movie Snitch isn't some cheesy family movie.  Snitch is actually much closer to what I envisioned for The Rock when he first moved from wrestling to doing movies.  While a little smarter than you might expect, Snitch is far from being a great action film.  In fact, I really can't this a much of an action flick at all.  If you go into this expecting a action packed film filled with car chases and gun play, you're going to be really disappointed.  This is the first of at least four Dwayne Johnson movies coming out this year, so hopefully one of these will hit.  The guy deserves it.

It's another movie based on 'true events', and many of you know how I cringe whenever I see that in the opening credits.  Johnson plays John Matthews, the owner of a construction company.  Matthews' son, Jason (Rafi Gavron), is busted for accepting a box of drugs shipped by his friend.  Unfortunately for Jason, it's a large enough amount that it's considered intent to distribute.  Due to tougher mandatory minimum sentencing, he's going away for 10 years if convicted.  The whole thing is basically a setup to get first time offenders and lower level people to rat out others in up the ladder in exchange for reduced sentencing.  The problem for Jason is that his friend already snitched on him, leaving nobody for him to rat out.  John doesn't want to see his son rot away in prison for what his family believes was just a dumb mistake, so he makes a deal with a local politician (Susan Sarandon) to go undercover and help bring some drug dealers down.

Now, I had to look it up, and I guess you could say the "based on true events" part relates to that there are very strict minimum sentencing laws, even for first time offenders.  The funny thing is that there's actually a scene of The Rock looking this stuff up on Wikipedia.  It's if they're saying, "Don't worry, we actually did our research."  Or maybe they are daring us to look into it ourselves.  I did see that one of the criticisms of the minimum sentencing is that it takes the power away from the judges, not allowing them to issue sentences on a case by case basis.  I thought one of the themes of Snitch was how unfair this all seemed to be.  Jason didn't have any priors, and you can't help but wonder why they throw the book at him, when you can see that he wasn't a drug trafficker.

Sarandon's character (I don't recall her being mentioned by name, but The Rock would say, "It doesn't matter what your name is!") believes in the minimum laws, regardless of the situation.  She sees John's willingness to go undercover as a no risk play for her to get more drug dealers off the street and help her re-election.  Even the law enforcement agent (Barry Pepper) they are working with thinks she may be going too far in risking a citizen's life and family.  You start to wonder who the real bad guy is.  That's where I thought Snitch had a little more going for it than just a simple crime drama.  The issue with the story by Justin Haythe and Ric Roman Waugh (who also directed) was that it only scratches the surface of some of these underlying themes.  The movie could have taken more of a stronger stance or showed more of the behind-the-scenes political motivations, but it's not that deep.

The main problem with Waugh's direction is that he really drags the film out, where if it had gone deeper into some of these themes, you wouldn't have noticed the length as it would have been more compelling overall.  When a movie is this long (almost two hours), you hope there's going to be a good payoff at the end, but that's where Snitch really falls apart.  While the action picks up, it devolves into a big car chase with explosions and cars flipping everywhere.  It doesn't help the Matthews' plan had too many parts with a very small margin for error for it to have possibly worked.  It all ties up a little too neatly.

Plus, and this is one of the same issues I had with Identity Thief, is it normal for law enforcement agents and politicians to sign off on letting private citizens take the law into their own hands or go undercover on their behalf?  You look at John Matthews and he looks like a guy that can handle himself, but that doesn't mean he has the training needed to survive. Aren't they opening themselves up to huge liability if things go wrong?

Another issue I had was the use of too much handheld camera work, even in regular scenes.  There's a simple meeting that happens in the film and the camera just jittery and jumping around all the place for no reason.  I shouldn't get motion sickness watching people talk.

Ever since The Rundown, I've been waiting for Dwayne Johnson to have that hit that puts him up there with the likes of Stallone and Schwarzenegger, but it just hasn't worked out that way yet.  The irony is that he's a better actor than either of them, has just as much charisma, and is infinitely more articulate. I also hear he's a pretty good cook, too.  Johnson stretches a bit out of his comfort zone and gets a chance to show some emotional range here.  It's definitely his most serious work so far. Another thing that stands out about him is, well, how much he stands out.  He really is a beast compared to the average guy. Even when he casually walks around he looks like he can knock down a wall if he's not careful.

The rest of the supporting cast does a good job.  Barry Pepper looks like he's auditioning for a role in Justified, and I think he'd fit in pretty well actually.  Susan Sarandon is always a welcome sight on screen, who automatically adds class and hotness to anything she's in.  Now that Shane is dead on The Walking Dead (spoiler!), Jon Bernthal gets to play an ex-con that introduces The Rock to Omar Little from The Wire (Michael Kenneth Williams).  Bernthal and Williams get a decent amount screen time, but again, it seems like there was more to their characters hinted at by the story, but not delved into enough.

Snitch has a few good things going for it, mainly Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson and a smarter than expected setup, but in the end it's undercut by a plodding pace and tonally inconsistent ending.  It's a shame because there was some potential here for it to be a much better film, and a few tweaks here and there would have made this above average.  Snitch is ultimately a very average, and somewhat forgettable, film that will make for a good rental in a few months.

2.5 (out of 5) Death Stars