Terminator: Genisys (2015)

In the simplest terms, it's not as bad or serious as the fourth, and not as cheesy as the third. The first 30 minutes or so of Genisys feel like a highlight reel of all the best and memorable moments of the Terminator franchise, but from a slightly different perspective. It's actually pretty fun.

Then, it transitions into a convoluted story regarding time travel and alternate timelines that only makes you cringe and scratch your head. I'm not sure we can expect much less at this point. They have to do something unusual to keep justifying this story continuing on. How many times has the resistance defeated Skynet at this point? Has any Terminator succeeded in killing the Connors in any timeline?

We're now on our, like, third version of Skynet's origin. At least this one has a lot of callbacks to T1 (or is it just T?) and T2, so it feels like more of a true sequel than the others. In fact, it pretty much totally ignores 3 and 4 entirely. I think most fans won't mind that. I'll admit that I had fun with 3 though. The fourth I can still do without.

The effects were good, especially when dealing with the older Terminator models. We've never seen a T-800 move around like this. However, there's a point where you see these things beating on each other, and I know they're tough, but you're like, "Shouldn't these things be pretty banged up by now?" We're dealing with movie physics though, so shut up, nerd!

The cast seemed like they were having fun, at least. Arnold is, of course, Arnold, and he plays this with the same dry sense of humor that he always has. It's just fun to see him where he belongs. Jason Clarke played a great line between heroic and creepy. I've been hard on Jai Courtney, but he was good as Kyle Reese, even a bit more charming than Michael Biehn (that's probably blasphemy of some kind). I'm sure most are going to watch this for Emilia Clarke (no relation to Jason), and she also does a great job. She was tough, but it would have been nice to see her buffed up a little bit. I'm surprised they didn't force her on Crossfit regime before filming. Anyway, the hierarchy of Sarah Connors goes like this:

1. Linda Hamilton
2. Emilia Clarke
3. Lena Headey

It's kind of interesting that the last two actresses that played Sarah Connor have been English. I guess there are a shortage of sandy blond actresses available to play a 20-something, Los Angeles native, to the point where they had to get a British brunette girl to play her. Go figure.

Watch out for a cameo from a Doctor...

Anyway, I don't want to spoil much, so I'd recommend it as a matinee to fans of the series. It's pretty mindless and harmless entertainment. It actually succeeds at being pretty funny at times. I enjoyed myself for the most part.

...oh, and don't leave when the credits start...

3 (out of 5) Death Stars

Dark Skies (2013) - Movie Review

I think this is the alien version of an atomic wedgie...

I really don't have much to say about Dark Skies, so I'll try to keep this short.  I wasn't even sure what kind of 'horror' film this was going to be based on the commercials.  Was this going to be supernatural themed or alien themed?  The opening credits ends that suspense, but when watching Dark Skies, I became convinced that even writer/director Scott Stewart wasn't sure what kind of film he wanted to make.  When you see how the end plays out, I believe that a lot of what was in the film felt like reshoots done after initial test screenings didn't go well. It doesn't help that it borrows heavily from movies like Poltergeist and Close Encounters either.  I get that a horror film these days is going to have a lot of familiar elements, but the problem with Dark Skies is that it doesn't fully commit to either angle, so we're left with a muddled and uninteresting flick.

I thought the film might actually have a chance at first was because of the cast.  I've always liked Keri Russell, but I would think she's at a point in her career where she doesn't need to be in such a generic horror film.  She seemed like she was really trying, too.  Her older son (Dakota Goyo), has kind of a funny arc about trying to get his first kiss and grab a boob, which I felt was one of the better parts of the film.  It made me think I was watching real people for a change.  The entire family felt pretty realistic in the first half of the film.  I really perked up when I saw J.K. Simmons name in the opening credits, because it's rare when he's in something I don't like. Unfortunately, when he finally does show up as 'the alien expert', it's so late in the film that I had actually forgot he was supposed to be in it.  His scenes are pretty disconnected from the rest of the film, as they only occur in his apartment (in an undisclosed location), which further added to the feeling that his entire presence in the film was added as afterthought.

Another reason why I think this wasn't always supposed to be an alien flick is due to the fact that when they are first revealed, the alien has a different look than the ones you see at the end of the film.  There's a good hour in-between their appearances. Also, what's up with aliens always being naked?  When going to another planet, don't you think some kind of uniform or environmental protection might be important?  They've created the advanced technology to travel millions of light years and abduct people and experiment on them without detection, but they've evolved past the point of needing clothes? They don't need pockets?

So, Dark Skies decides to go with aliens, but what do they want?  They just want to bully and screw with you.  First, it's a mess being made in the kitchen (one time was a pretty obvious ripoff of Poltergeist).  Then, all of the pictures in their house are stolen, but they leave the frames behind.  At one point we see a bazillion birds kamikaze into their house, and nobody knows why.  Things escalate to the entire family hearing weird ringing in their ears, bruises and marks show up on their bodies, and they even have black outs, losing hours at a time.  Again, there's not a lot about what's happening that is specific to aliens, versus something supernatural.  Markings do appear that seem to be of alien origin, but when other parents notice them on the kids, people think they are being abused.  That's actually an area of the film that could have been really interesting if they had used that more.  Do something like have Child Protective Services take the kids away, and then the parents struggle to convince others they aren't responsible and prevent their abduction by aliens at the same time.

One thing that's always bugged me about these kinds of films is that regardless of whether it's aliens, demons, or whatever, why are they selecting someone that isn't all that important in the grand scheme of things?  If you're gonna possess or abduct someone, why not chose a world leader or someone like that?  Why is it always a pre-teen or suburban family that's the target?  It's not like these people have any ability to stop what's happening, and would anyone even notice they're missing for a while?  I guess there's something to be said for going after an easy target.  Well, the explanation for this provided by Dark Skies is that there is no reason.  No reason at all.  When the parents finally talk to J.K. Simmons, he tells them that it's just what the aliens do, and they've been doing it this way for a long time.  When they ask why they're being experimented on, they are basically told, "Do doctors explain to lab rats why they do the things they do?  Would you even understand if they did?" So, I came away from Dark Skies thinking the aliens were like a cat playing with a mouse before eating it, or sadistic kids torturing small animals.

The thing is that it still would have been a passable movie if it wasn't so boring.  It honestly felt well over two hours long, and I was shocked to find it was only 95 minutes.  Part of why it's so boring is that Dark Skies is not scary at all.  There are a few cheap jump scares, and even those are telegraphed.  Some of the stuff that happens would have been creepy if the movie wasn't so slowly paced.

Dark Skies is a snoozefest that even fans of horror will have a tough time getting though.  It had potential, but it's lost with its lack of consistent direction and borrowing too heavily from better films.  There's not much I can recommend about it, and advise you to give this one a pass.

1 (out of 5) Death Stars

The Words (2012) - Movie Review

We begin with the reading of a book, The Words, by successful author Clay Hammond (Dennis Quaid).  The book is the story of another author, Rory Jansen (Bradley Cooper), who lives in New York with his girlfriend, Dora (Zoe Saldana).  Rory is an author struggling to get published, and is forced to get a day job when his father (J.K. Simmons) says he can't support him anymore and hints that maybe it's time to move on.

While on their honeymoon, the couple finds an old leather bag that contains an old manuscript. Rory reads it and realizes that it's better than anything he's ever written.  He types it, word for word, into his computer just for the experience of having the book go through his hands.  Dora finds the re-typed manuscript and is moved by it.  She encourages him to get it published, and Rory can't bring himself to tell her that he didn't write it.

The book is a hit and things are looking up for Rory, but things get complicated when the book's original author, simply billed as "The Old Man" (Jeremy Irons), tracks Rory down and tells him his story.  We are transported to World War II France and get a mini period piece detailing how The Old Man wrote and then lost his book.  I felt this was the strength of the movie, simply for Jeremy Irons performance.  He just provided narration, but he's so good in that 'I could listen to him read the phone book' way.  It's worth watching The Words just for Jeremy Irons.

Most of the performances in The Words are strong.  I thought Bradley Cooper was great.  To think a few years ago I thought he was going to be a flash in the pan.  Cooper shows emotional depth that I don't think we've seen out of him up until now.  Zoe Saldana was good as well, but she wasn't given much to do and the story wasn't about her.  I also really enjoyed Ben Barnes and Nora Arnezender as the young couple from The Old Man's story.  He doesn't get enough screen time, but it's always great to see J.K. Simmons in anything.

You'd think that things would get really interesting once the two authors meet, but the problem is that The Old Man doesn't want anything from Rory.  As a result, the movie fizzles out and you never really get to see how this affects Rory.  There are some consequences, but Rory is never publicly outed and they don't spend very much time at all showing Rory deal with the guilt of what's he's done.

What should have been the emotional climax of the film ended up switching back to catch up with Clay, who's flirting with an apparent literary groupie played by Olivia Wilde.  She's very interested in the story, so you think there might be something deeper to her character, but there isn't.  I like Olivia Wilde, but once again she plays a role that felt thrown in just to have another pretty face in the movie.  I'm sure the script appealed to her, as her surname was taken from author Oscar Wilde.  There was some very odd and awkward interaction between Quaid and Wilde as he uncomfortably tried to flirt with her.  Have you ever had a friend that didn't quite know how to talk to women and tries way too hard, so it comes off as a little creepy?  It was like that.

With all this story within a story within a story, I felt like I was watching a literary version of Inception.  It's never truly clear if Clay is actually Rory or just telling a story.  They leave that up to you to decide, but it kind of felt like the movie was trying really hard to be clever.  The movie ends very abruptly and you're left wondering what the point was.  I'd like to ask co-writers and directors Brian Klugman and Lee Sternthal what they were really trying to say here.

I'd love to write more about this movie, but I can't find...The Words.  Ha ha ha!  Do you see what I did with that totally hilarious joke that I in no way had any assistance with?

The Words is a very well acted and good looking film, but the story is overly complex and ultimately something that won't stick with you.  I do think it's worth watching for the performances, especially Jeremy Irons, but this is better suited for a rental.

2.5 (out of 5) Death Stars