Lone Survivor (2013)

I realized before watching Lone Survivor is that the title itself is a spoiler.  Even without being familiar with the real events this was based on or reading Marcus Luttrell's book about his experience, all you have to do is look at the title to know how it's going to turn out.  It kind of a downer when the title saps some of the suspense of a film.  Imagine if The Sixth Sense had been alternatively titled He's a Ghost?

Lone Survivor is the true story of Operation Red Wings in Afghanistan.  Marcus Luttrell (Mark Wahlberg) is part of a four-man Navy Seal team, the remainder played by Ben Foster, Taylor Kitsch and Emile Hirsch, on a mission to capture a Taliban leader.  While staking out the small village where he's hiding, a trio of goat herders, including two boys, happens upon them.  They have to make a difficult choice: let them go and hope they can get to safety before the Taliban finds them, or kill them and complete their mission.  They decide to uphold the rules of engagement and take their chances.  For the record, I voted for killing them, but I'm a murderous, cyborg psychopath.

Of course the Taliban catches up to them, and from there it becomes fight for survival.  A punishing, white-knuckle fight for survival.

Lone Survivor is just brutal at times.  This is not a glamorous film about war.  The amount of bodily abuse these guys take is superhuman.  It helps that the film begins with a montage of SEAL training.  When you see how grueling it is, it's easier to understand how these soldiers can keep going while taking so much punishment.  It's what they were trained for.

Their fight is unrelenting, and it's a little heartbreaking knowing in advance how it's going to turn out. This kind of leads into my only real issue with Lone Survivor.  We don't get to know the individuals very well. Writer/director Peter Berg decided to focus more on the action and overall heroism than any type of character moments. There are a few small details here and there, but we know almost nothing about them otherwise.  In fact, I struggled to recall anyone's name by the end.  We care because they are our soldiers and we want to see them survive, but not because of any emotional investment we have with them.  As the film is a tribute to these soldiers, I would have liked to know more about them personally.

Despite not getting to know the team, there is a clear sense of brotherhood and how much they care about each other.  Team is made up of a very strong cast that makes it a little easier to connect with them.  While Wahlberg is the star, I don't want to single anyone out as it kind of takes away from the sacrifice they collectively made.  It didn't take too long before I stopped seeing them as Marky Mark, Warren Worthington, the kid from The Girl Next Door and Tim Riggins, and just saw them as soldiers.  And of course no military-themed Peter Berg film would be complete without a Turtle (Jerry Ferrara) sighting.

The overall intensity of the action makes it easy to overlook these flaws.  Once the firefight begins, you'll be on the edge of your seat until the conclusion.  With the way the action was shot, there are many moments where you feel immersed in it.  I'm kicking myself for not seeing this in RPX as the sound was fantastic.  There are rattling explosions that made me jump in my seat a few times.  Nothing beats the throaty, metallic sound of the sniper rifle either.  Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe it was an MK 12 (had to look it up).  A better sound system in the theatre would have really made this sing.

Sure, you might come out of it a little, "Rah, rah, USA," but what's wrong with that?  I'm sure that's a little bit of what Peter Berg was going for, but it's not over the top.  I didn't watch Lone Survivor and feel like it was a recruitment film or shoving politics in your face.  It's pretty neutral as far as that goes, and is more about the mission and the the sacrifice of the soldiers.

While Lone Survivor is a brutal war movie, it's also a powerful tribute to the courage and resilience of these soldiers.  If this wasn't based on a true story, it would be easier to watch this as simply a very good action film, but knowing the sacrifice behind it adds a solemn feeling.  Definitely worth a watch though and one of the more realistic films about war I've seen in a while.

4 (out of 5) Death Stars

Grown Ups 2 (2013)

Wait, say that again?  There's a sequel to Grown Ups?

I was surprised as anyone the first time I saw the trailer for Grown Ups 2.  Did anyone actually like it?  I don't know anyone that does, but maybe that's because they're afraid of being Force-choked for admitting that in my presence.  Good taste aside, I guess the first made enough money because there's no way they'd make another one otherwise.

I guess the beauty of Grown Ups 2 for the studio is that it couldn't have taken more than a week or two to make, and the budget couldn't have been spent on much else than the actor's salaries.  I know they didn't spend money on writers or an editor.  Grown Ups 2 doesn't even have a plot.  Seriously, I defy anyone to watch Grown Ups 2 and tell me what it's about.  It's just a bunch of short sketches and gags.  I think this is what frustrates me about Adam Sandler and Co. so much.  With these guys being SNL alumni, you'd think this would be their strength.  Also, we've all seen guys like David Spade, Tim Meadows, Kevin James, Chris Rock, and even Nick Swardson be much funnier in their own standup routines, other movies and TVs shows.  Yet somehow combining all of these guys amounts to a bunch of lazy, uninspired comedy.  Is it that they don't care, have total contempt for the audience, or genuinely think this stuff is funny?  I can't help but watch Grown Ups 2 and think that if they had just put even a modicum of effort into the writing, then we'd genuinely have a funny movie on our hands.  I can forgive a lack of plot if the movie is hilarious otherwise.

A lot of the humor is based on things that simply can't happen in reality.  The opening scene is the one you see in the trailer where somehow a deer gets into the house and up to a second story bedroom without anyone noticing or waking up.  I guess it was a stealth deer.  This leads into a stupid pee joke that wasn't funny in the first place, but looked awful because they did it with bad CG.  They do this pee joke twice!  Why is this even in the movie?  They could have not put this in the movie and saved the money on the bad CG.  Cause F-you, that's why!

At least I didn't find the humor as mean spirited as in Sandler's more recent films.  However, if you aren't into poop, fart or throw up gags, then there's a lot you aren't going to like.  I'll admit there's a part of me that still can laugh a good fart or burp, so when Kevin James does his burp-sneeze-fart I couldn't help but chuckle a little.  I also got a giggle out of some of the various cameos sprinkled throughout the film.  The thing is a cameo isn't a joke by itself, and many are dependent on you even knowing who these people are.  Like if you don't recognize older SNL cast members, ESPN anchors, or lesser known comedians, their appearances will likely go unnoticed by you.

The rest of the film is lame fratboy humor, or making fun of characters that aren't aware they are the butt of the joke.  There's a running gag where Tim Meadows and family just go "Whaaa?!" anytime they are insulted.  There's no comeback, just "Whaaa?!"  It doesn't go anywhere, and it's a non-joke.  Lots of these scenes ended abruptly when it wasn't working.  It didn't seem to be working on the audience either as I heard muted laughter at most of these things.

As with all Sandler films, his obsession with the 80's continue.  We get our normal fix of 80's music, but the film ends with a 80's themed party.  I wonder who's idea that was?  It's just another lame reason to shoehorn more 80's references into the movie.  I love the 80's as much as the next guy, but this is gone way past being old.  Although I did think it was kind of funny to see Chris Rock dressed as 80's Prince.

Lastly, I'm glad they had the good sense to get rid of that scene about getting wasted and tricking the kids into thinking it had something to do with ice cream  "I'm wanna get chocolate wasted!"  Did a child actually write that?  Ugh...so much of this film is just cringeworthy.

Grown Ups 2 is lazy, uninspired, childish, unfunny and directionless.  If the name Adam Sandler wasn't on the top of the poster, I don't see how this film sees the light of day, let alone gets made.  The only reason I'm not giving this a zero is that I chucked a few times at the cameos and I haven't completely outgrown burp and fart humor.  There are some genuinely funny films in theaters right now.  Grown Ups 2 isn't one of them.  Don't pay to see this film in any format.

.5 (out of 5) Death Stars